Lost and Found
by fanngirling101
Summary: Katniss Everdeen's family is killed in a tragic accident but Katniss believes they were murdered. Haunted by the memories, her doctors think she's insane but will she find refuge in her friends, a friendly boy with blue eyes and his beliefs that at first must seem as crazy as she?- This is an AU. Kind of like a modern panem with no hunger games.
1. Loss

_My name is Katniss Everdeen, I live in District twelve, I am 20 years old, my family was murdered, the nurses tell me that I'm safe. That no one can hurt me here. They think that I'm imagining the threat to my life. I know there wrong. No one believes me._

"Hey, Katniss. How are you feeling?" I don't look up from the rope in my hands, just keep tying, untying and re-tying.

"Well that's a stupid question," I hear Johanna snort.

 _Over, under, around._

"She's crazy. Store bought muffins and books don't help the clinically insane." With perpetually shaking hands I jerk a few segments of the rope and the knot loosens and falls to the cold, white hospital floor. I squeeze my fists tight, close my eyes.

 _"Prim!" I push open the door of my home. When I step inside I immediately know something is wrong. I raise my bow. The house looks normal. The picture frames holding images of my mother and father with Prim on her fifth birthday are completely straight; everything in its proper place._

 _Until I reach Prim's room. I push the door open and there's Prim lying on the floor eyes open but the life that used to shine so brightly in them is gone._

"Katniss?" Someone rests there hand on mine and I jump. It's a male hand. I look up. Bronze hair , green eyes, handsome features. Finnick. I feel the tears rise and throw my arms around his neck, sobbing. "I'm so sorry, Katniss." I don't know exactly what he's apologizing for, but I appreciate it anyway.

"It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart." I remember the words he spoke to me at the police station and I try to pull myself together, but the tears come faster and my sobs grow louder. I vaguely notice that someone is talking to him and I calm down enough to hear what they're saying.

"…need to.

"You're not sedating her!" One of his hands moves from around me and I cling tighter to him afraid he is going to leave. "No!" I feel something like a mosquito sting and everything goes black.

…

 _"Katniss!" I hear my sister yell. "Katniss, help!"_

 _"Prim!" I search wildly for her among the trees until I reach the fence. "Prim!" I shout again. Suddenly I'm in front of my house a foul smell emanating from within._

 _"Mom! Dad! Prim!" Prim calls again this time accompanied by my parents. Run to the door but I seem to go agonizingly slow. When I finally reach the door I thrust it open and the smell worsens. My stomach machine rolls with nausea. I walk through the house frantically searching every room until I reach Prim's. The door opens by itself and I see my family all lying in a heap their blood mingling in a solitary pool at my feet. Their mouths are still moving speaking my name._

 _"Katniss, Katniss, Katniss."_

 **Two weeks earlier.**

"Has she woken up yet?" In the thickness of sleep the voice is faint, as if coming from far away.

"No. Not yet." I am about to open my eyes when the first voice starts again and I recognize it now.

"Why's she been out so long?"

There was no response. I open my mouth to ask why on earth they are watching me sleep. But don't have the energy.

"Wait… I think she's waking up." I open my eyes instead, still not quite fully awake. I try to speak again.

"Gale?" My voice is rough from sleep.

"I'm here, Catnip." He takes my hand in his.

"What happened?" My memories are fuzzy. All I remember is an emotion that can only be described as sorrow. A soul-deep pain that radiates through my body as a nearly paralyzing weakness. I still feel it now but I can't remember why.

Gale looks stricken as he asks, "You don't remember?" I see him look behind him, and I use nearly all my strength to follow his gaze. Finnick. Yes, his was the other voice I heard. They're both silent. They just look at me both with the same expression: agony.

"Katniss…" Finnick trailed off. And I start panicking. What was so terrible that they were so inept to explain. My breathing becomes shallow and comes faster.

"What- happ-" And then I remember something. Just the slight tingle of a memory not quite recalled but also not quite forgotten. I sift through my memories trying to extract the right one; the one that is freezing these two grown men in there tracks.

"You- you tried…" and I remember what had been prickling at the back of my mind and my eyes fill with tears.

"My mom, Dad, Prim. They-" I look frantically between two of my best friends in the world, into their sober faces and ask the question that I already know the answer to. "Are they… are they dead?" I stutter.

Gale just nods. I try to cover my face with my hands but when I lift them I am pulled up short by restraints attached to a bed that I now realize is a hospital bed. And then I notice the fluorescent lights and large windows that rather than just opening to the outdoors open to a reception desk where a group of nurses laugh together. Don't they know that my world is falling apart? Don't they know that the people I care about most are gone? And then I remember the worst part.

I struggle against the restraints now in full blown panic. I look into Gales eyes, pleading. "Gale. Why…" No, I know why. "You have to let me out of here! They're coming, Gale. They're coming!"

"Katniss, calm down." Gale holds my arms against the bed effectively stopping my struggling. " What are you talking about? Who's coming?"

"Whoever killed them!"

"What?" He was perplexed.

"They're coming for me next, Gale! They put me in these restraints!" I struggle against the restraints losing all hope that they will provide any help in this situation. Why won't he let me up?

"Katniss, do you remember what happened after you found… Out?" He doesn't directly mention my family again and I briefly wonder if he thinks that talking about it would make it worse. As if I could feel worse than I already do. Or be in any more danger than I am. Really, as if life can get any worse than it is now. But I humor him. Thinking that maybe I can get out of here faster if I play along, I focus on his question and try to remember. Again that tingling…

"You tried to…" Gale releases my arms and collapses into the chair he had just vacated. He rubs his hand over his face.

"You tried to kill yourself." I had forgotten Finnick was there. It takes a moment to grasp what he's saying. I… there's a flash of a memory… Pills? I can feel my eyes widen as understanding hits. Did I? Did I try to kill myself. It's too much. I can't… why would I try to kill myself when whomever killed my family is still out there? Why would I try to kill myself before I made them pay for what they did? I couldn't have.

 **Gale's POV**

"Gale don't be stupid! Why would I do that? That would be giving them what they want."

I'd looked to Finnick helplessly but he'd looked just as lost as I. That was three days ago. My best friend is going through the worst pain of her life and it had driven her to the unthinkable and now she seemed to be walking the edge of sanity. What her doctor is saying now confirms it.

"I don't like what I'm seeing." Says Dr. Shepherd thoughtfully. His brow is furrowed and he writes agitatedly in her chart.

"So what's wrong with her? Is she…" As crazy as she sounds? I couldn't bring myself to finish the thought.

"Well this girl has suffered quite a trauma. Finding anyone you love, let alone your whole immediate family, deceased would take quitter the toll on anyone. Right now I think my diagnoses would have to be paranoid delusional due to excessive trauma. And I definitely think she is a danger to herself and others. I would recommend finding a care center for her." My heart dropped.

"You mean the Nut House?" I wish that I'd left Johanna at home. Usually I found her tendency to say whatever was on her mind endearing but now was not the time for it.

The doctor cleared his throat. "A psychological care facility. "

"You think that this may be permanent?" Finnick chimed in.

"Possibly," the doctor said sympathetically. "It's also entirely possible that she be back to normal tomorrow morning. But at this time I must insist that you find a care facility for her."

I drop my head into my hands. I know I can fight this. I'm her closest relative; I can choose to take her home with Johanna and I, but I have to discern what would be best for Katniss and Johanna and I. I can't bear to think of her in some cold asylum where all they would do is shove pills down her throat and restrain her if she gets upset. But if what the doctor said is true and she is a danger to herself and others- which at this point I believe he is- than I can't bring that kind of danger into my household.

I feel Johanna slip her arms around my waist from behind and rest her cheek on my back. "So what are you going to do?"

I turn to face her and slide my arms around my wife. "Well…"


	2. Arrival

"She's crazy. Store bought muffins and books don't help the clinically insane."

My chest tightens as I remember the words Johanna spoke just a few hours ago. _I'm not crazy_. I tie and untie the rope in my hands faster than I would have thought possible, resulting in some pretty bad rope burn. But I don't mind; in fact I welcome them. The burns help me stay in reality. The pain reminds me that though I'm in the worst emotional pain I've ever been in- and ever will be- I am still alive and I will find out who caused this. I will escape this wack- job hotel they're taking me to and I'm going to kill whoever is responsible for my family's death.

I say "hotel" because as far as madhouses go this one is very near opulent. Though I have yet to arrive, Gale and Johanna hoped to convince me just how nice it was by showing me their website and all the pictures of what used to be a mansion belonging to someone named Cornelius Snow. (The story was on their homepage.) Apparently Snow's grandmother "fell ill in the mind" (as the old timey story stated.) He'd loved his grandmother and dearly and didn't want her to have leave the place that had been her home for nearly ninety years so Snow, the legal owner of the home, turned it into an lunatic asylum and dedicated it to his grandmother; though when he was asked why he didn't name it after her he answered "I don't want this to be as any other asylum, named after someone no one knows about. I want this place to be a shining light of hope in such days of trials." I rolled my eyes. It was probably all a hoax. Just publicity.

We are all here. Finnick, Johanna, Gale even Vick, Gales younger brother but no one speaks. There isn't much to say. I manage to only think of the bizarre story for the rest of the silent car ride. When the car is stopped I stare down at the rope willing Gale to change his mind and keep on going. Vick, who was sitting in the front of the car with Gale, opens my door. I stare at the rope.

Someone rests their hand on my shoulder. I jump. "Katniss." Vick.

I look up at him but all I see is the sign high above him.

Evergreen Forest Mental Institution.

A very unassuming name as far as funny farms go. Regardless of that fact a shiver runs down my spine. I look to the faces around me. My friends. The ones leaving me here, not wanting to be responsible for me anymore. I look to Vick, a child of only fourteen. He had nothinges to do with this.

His eyes are soft as he offers me his hand. The little gentleman, I think to myself. He helps me from the car and, him being tall for his age, we are eye to eye. I throw my arms around him. He hugs me back.

"I don't think you're crazy, Katniss." I smile through some tears and take a deep breath.

"Thank you." I pull away and brush his hair back from his forehead and realize these are our goodbyes. "Tell Posy..." I pause. I don't know how much she knows of the situation, being only ten years old. "Tell her I love her and wish I could see her?" He gives a nod.

Next Finnick wraps his arms tightly around me. "Remember, I have a friend inside. He'll look out for you, okay?" I nod against his shoulder. "He won't be working today but you'll meet him tomorrow."

When it comes time to say goodbye to Gale I just stare at him. He does look sad. I think he senses that I wouldn't welcome a hug from him right now because he keeps his distance.

"Katniss..." He wavers a moment then picks up where he left off. "I really do think that this is the best thing for you." His hands are shoved deep in his pockets, his eyes look intently into mine.

I ask, "Does Rory know?" Rory enlisted straight out of high school and is stationed somewhere around District 2.

"Not yet. We're planning to tell him tonight." I nod. They want to get me inside and settled before he can convince them not to follow through. He was always a persuasive one. I smile for the first time in weeks though I'm still on the brink of tears. I love these people like my family, Vick, Rory, and Posy especially. I wish the latter two where here as well.

This is as far as Finnick and Johanna go. Gale and Vick accompany me inside. At the front desk there is a woman with an orb of bright pink hair and a tan dress. As Gale speaks with the woman at the desk Vick leans toward me and whispers, "She looks like a strawberry ice cream cone!" I know he is just trying to lighten my spirits but he's right. I snicker. How could something so ostentatious be allowed? I find myself wondering.

"Katniss?" I look at Gale. "Are you ready to see your room?" I nod. Briefly, I wonder what my roommate will be like. Likely a screwball. Hopefully she won't be a violent one. We ascend one of two lavish, white stone staircases that lead to the same large overhang that allows you to look over the massive entryway. The woman from the desk veers left and Gale follows, Vick and I following suit.

What if I am crazy? What if I never get out of here? My fingers start twitching nervously against my legs. Apparently, Vick noticed because I feel his fingers slip through mine. Vick has always been so different from Gale; where Gale was oblivious, Mr. Masculinity every moment, Vick was finely attuned to the people around him, picking up on nearly everything around him. It was like a superpower.

The woman stopped and opened a door motioning us in behind her. I stop at the threshold. Vick releases my hand and enters the room giving me a few seconds alone and I'm grateful. Irrationally it feels like if I enter the room I've been assigned it will become mine. The thought is terrifying. I can't stay here long. Maybe if I pretend to believe that I'm imagining a conspiracy they'll let me out sooner.

"Catnip?" Gale breaks into my thoughts. I finally step into the room. "What do you think?"

The room has doubles of everything. Two twin beds, two dressers, two desks. There was also a small window by one of the beds. I just nod in approval.

The woman's hand flies to an ear piece that I hadn't noticed she was wearing. "I'll be back in just a moment. Katniss, your roommate has arrived; I'll bring her up in a moment. If you three would wait here?" She smiled and closed the door behind her effectively eliminating our choice in the matter.

We stand awkwardly in the middle of the room. Anxious, I search in the pockets of my sweats for my length of rope. I search in my pockets three times before allowing myself to panic. "It's gone." I look frantically around the pristine floor and seeing it nowhere I look back and forth between the boys. "Did you take it?" I am bouncing on the balls of my feet in my anxiety.

They both just look at me, stunned. I run for the door and jerk it open. I scan the floor still seeing it nowhere.

"Katniss!"

I run down the hallway wishing I'd payed more attention to where we were going. I randomly pick a direction all the while scanning the floor for the rope. Nothing. Not even dust. Reaching a dead end, I turn and dodge Gale who tries to grab me as I backtrack. Where is Vick? Are they planning to ambush me?

Then Vick appears and I skid to a halt. In his hand is my rope.

 **Gale's POV**

Katniss snatches the rope from a frozen Vick and procedes with the simple poacher's knot I taught her when we were kids.

"Katniss?" I say warning her of my presence before resting my hand on her back and guiding her back to her room. "Vick, c'mon." I don't turn to see if he follows, just gently push Katniss forward.

From the look of it we arrive just after Effie does. "Mr. Hawthorn! Where have you been?" My throat is tight with un-shed, and very un-manly tears.

"We- uh... had a little mishap. It's been resolved now." I usher Katniss into her room where there is a girl with red hair and green eyes sitting on one of the two identical beds. I feel like a father dropping his daughter off at kindergarten for the first time. The girl stands up seeming remarkably together to be in here.

"Hello, I'm Annie Cresta."

 **A/N hope you enjoy. Please review :) The name for the assylum came from: #.WCv3zehOmf1**


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